10 Steps to Improving Self-Esteem
Written by: Anita Revel
Published on: June 7, 2012
Self-esteem is a small word, but its condition has the biggest impact on your daily life. Whether your self-esteem is high or low, it impacts your moods and actions when dealing with people. It also affects how people treat you in return. By adopting a few of these simple esteem boosters, you can learn to be a happier person, confident to control your own destiny.
Say No to Negativity. Negative emotions such as anger, frustration, envy, blame and impatience are normal in small doses. You are allowed to experience these emotions, but give yourself a time limit to stay with them. When your time is up, stay STOP! out aloud and choose to cancel the thought or feeling and replace it with a positive one. Browse through motivational blurbs at GreatDay.com to counteract negative feelings.
Laugh Out Loud. Open your clown chakra, a psychic energy point located between the belly-laugh chakra and the milk-spurting-out-the-nose chakra. Do this by taking a deep breath and belly-laughing (with or without milk) for five minutes straight. Laughter empowers you in hopeless situations and gives you a sense of control when things around you seem crazy. If you can laugh at your situations you can survive the terrible things that happen to you.
Give Your Inner Critic a Tea Break. If you get a compliment, learn to say Thank you! Don't brush it away because that's how you've been taught to handle a compliment. If you're not getting any, start handing them out. As "what goes around comes around" you will soon enjoy receiving plenty in return.
Practice Shameless Affirmations. An affirmation is a short statement (present tense), of how you would like to be now. Make it a habit to repeat the affirmation sincerely and often. When your psyche hears, over and over again, how valuable you are as a person, you will start to believe it and manifest your state of mind. Visit Affirmations Central for a comprehensive list of affirmations to choose from.
Choose How You Respond to people and situations. You can either hide under the Rock of Denial and lash out and blame others, or you can behave with dignity, courage and humour. Know that you have the power to choose the image of a happy and confident person. When you are at the crossroads of how you will respond, say out aloud, I choose dignity to help you take a conscious, worthy direction.
Perform Random Acts of Kindness. Sharing abundance and goodwill makes people happy and gives you a warm feeling of satisfaction. Usually RAOK are your own personal secret, but don't limit yourself to private acts only. Pay the road toll of the car behind you, volunteer at a soup kitchen, or tip the author of this column. Zillions of RAOK suggestions are listed at the RAOK website -- you can even start your own web-page here to share your achievements!
Write Your Own Eulogy. This may sound macabre, but by writing a speech about all your great qualities will reinforce all your good aspects. If you have attributes you want included in your eulogy, commit to incorporating them into the way you present yourself to people.
Dress for success. A smile is the first thing someone notices about you. To create a fabulous first impression, show your pearly whites in a dazzling smile to sweep people off their feet. Clothing-wise, respect yourself by dressing and grooming in the best manner that will radiate your gorgeous inner self. Listen to your instinct, and dress accordingly. If you're comfortable in your own skin, you'll be at the centre of balance when interacting with other people.
Reminisce. Share a meal with your family or friends and take turns to talk about a funny memory. Start off the story with I remember when... for a great catalyst. Flicking through photo albums are also a great way to trigger memories, not to mention tickle the funny bone just looking at those god-awful fashions! Post your stories and pictures in a weblog (at blogspot.com, for example) so family and friends can read and contribute world-wide.
Spoil Yourself. Reward your good work with a treat, and don't you dare feel guilty about it! Tell yourself you deserve it, and believe it. Curl up on your sofa with a soppy romance, eat a chocolate bar after your tenth gym visit, or let a friend cook you a meal. Don't forget to thank yourself for your efforts -- it's all about appreciating You.
Anita Revel is an Australian author of books, articles and resources for women's well-being. View her work at AnitaRevel.com.